Been a long time since I last penned down a text entry so here i am, spending the final weekend of 2012 giving thanks to my Lord for all the good work He has done in every aspect of my life:
2012 was the year I undertook the responsibility of leading a full class of 20+ nursery kids. We started all the way from Jan and I must say it was a road filled with uncertainty but the Lord always had me in mind. He took care of my worries and cares, strengthened me, built up my confidence and guided me in times of struggle. It was a long year of trials and tests- from building trust & rapport with the parents, to transiting the kids from classrooms afters classrooms, to equipping kids with the knowledge they needed, to heading my PTM sessions, to undertaking web-design project to choreographing the year-end concert dance when I had no experience in dancing, to setting up my classroom for k1 2013… The Lord kept me strong and confident! When my fellow colleagues were struggling to meet deadlines, I found it easy to complete all my tasks well and ahead of time. I also received my first pay increment right after my probation period!
Everything went well for Leroy and I until June 2012 when I returned from a short trip in Hong Kong. Something felt weird. I confronted him and finally all hell broke loose when he confessed the struggle he had been battling with for weeks- he wasn’t ready for commitment. My whole world seemed to crash. Suddenly, it felt as though I was losing grasp of everything i thought i had. He told me that he didn’t want to get married, he was afraid and he feared the thought of having to be tied down by that commitment. L asked for a one-year grace period to think things through before making a decision for our future. We had HTHTs, I cried for many nights, I lost hope in our 5-year relationship but I still prayed and asked God for enlightenment. I asked God to help L see his plan for us.
After 3 months, HDB sent me an email notifying me of yet another BTO launch- AMK caught my eye. The location was tempting as it was only minutes away from the hub and interchange, our dream location. Without much thought, I forwarded the email to L and he showed interest. We discussed thoroughly and made the decision to apply. We just wanted to try our luck. I prayed the next one week and asked God to reveal His plan for us- if it is His plan, let it be done. After about 2 weeks, we received a letter AND WE WERE GRANTED A BALLOT NUMBER! We were given a queue #134 out of the 2000+ applications! Praise God!
I love shopping and so i chalked up alot of credit card bills from online shopping. Every month, it was a struggle to pay up. I had other commitments like bills and study loans, faith promise, etc. Many times, I worried about having the ability to pay the bank at the end of the month. God was gracious! God provided abundance! Not only was I always able to pay up on time, I also found that I had spare cash to fund my short holidays to Japan, Batam, Hong Kong, Bali… The Lord provided and never once left me with zero. Despite my high expenditure, the Lord never once forsaken me. He always provided a way for me to be free from debt, and allowed us to enjoy good food and lavish celebrations from time to time!
Also, L and I worried about being able to pay for our flat’s down-payment, but after praying and some calculations, we realized that we had enough from the 25K grant that we were eligible for, as well as from my CPF savings! God had made it possible for us to own our own flat!!
4. Health, and everything else
I returned to church after backsliding for years. Something in me just told me that I needed to return to the Father. Ever since, I grew in a deeper relationship with Him. I prayed more and seek Him more. God has anointed my body in 2012. Even though i work in a germ and bacteria-plagued environment, God strengthened my immune system and allowed my body to recover from viruses quickly. Jesus also blessed my family with good health. He has also watched over the family, especially my brother who is in Diver School. God has also answered all my prayers whenever i called out to Him. Hallelujah!
PLANS FOR 2013:
- Only believe in God
- Let Go & Let God
- Stay strong in faith!
- Make Jesus the CENTRE of all my priorities
- Grow in Christ: Spend more time alone with God, Listen for His voice, Trust in the Lord, Honour God in everything I do & Run to God